Out of Chaos an organizing newsletter
Self-Help and Snobbery
Some people like the anonymity of their Kindle so they can read Fifty Shades Of Grey on the subway. I haven’t read Fifty Shades, but I like my kindle’s anonymity when I read self-help. I know, I know: It is kind of ironic that I disdain self-help as a genre. I want to think of myself as a person who reads “lit-ra-ture” or feminist theory or even political analysis, but not self-help.
And yet, true to it’s name, it always helps. It just does. For the week after I read a parenting book, I am a better parent. The week after I read a book on nutrition, I do eat better. So why am I so disdainful? Well, because the whole time I am reading them I am thinking: “I know this, I know that.” And while it is true, it is also true (and you know it is) that knowing something in your head and being able to do it are two different things. This is what I have concluded about self-help: Whatever the topic, spirituality or parenting or nutrition, it creates a certain mindfulness, puts the issue at the front of our minds and makes us conscious of it, which makes us do better, at least for a little while.
Then the question becomes: Why don’t I just rotate between different self-help genres? From Tara Brach to Gretchen Rubin to Deepak Chopra and so forth? Because I don’t wanna! While it would be great if I was perfectly serene and never yelled at my kids and had perfect yogic posture, there is more to life than me. What would I talk about if I only read self-help books? Reading fiction takes me out of myself, and reading about current events makes me think about other people, and those things are important too.
If diversity is healthy for crops and schools, why not in reading?
I hope that when I send out these little missives they give you a little shot of self-help, in between novels and New Yorkers. I hope they help you to be mindful and pay attention to something in a new way.
At least for a few days.