Out of Chaos an organizing newsletter
What Do You Really Covet?
I was with a client yesterday who had a big file of clippings she had torn from magazines and filed as decorating inspiration. The good news was that she filed them, the bad news was that it was a big, space-sucking file, so I thought weeding it might be a quick way to reclaim some drawer space. She was pitching away, laughing at what she had liked in 1998, but she noticed she was still drawn to certain images, certain rooms. As we looked at them together, I realized something: “It isn’t really the room, your kitchen cabinets are just as nice as those—it’s the light.” She agreed. A few pages later she showed me a picture of a beautiful living room, which opened out onto a meadow. “Do I want the couch? Or the view?” she asked. Exactly.
I am very aware of advertising. I know that when I covet something I see on a model, that what I really want is to look like the model: tall and thin. But even if I buy those clothes, I’m going to be me: not tall, not like a model. So I resist. Mostly.
When I see a couch in an ad, I know it’s going to look different in my living room, with my bookcases and my kids and my coffee table, than it does in the 2,000-square-foot white studio in the photograph.
It’s the same thing when we buy stuff for our kids. We crave connection and simplicity, so we buy Scrabble and wooden puzzles when what they want is an X-box and an iPhone. In fact, we might not need to buy anything—we might just need to put down our iPhones to get that connection we covet.
To covet is human, but build your awareness. Ask yourself: Is it really the couch or is it the sunlight? Is it really the dress or the way she wears it? Sadly, we can’t buy sunlight, but it’s better to know that before you bring the sofa home.