Out of Chaos an organizing newsletter
Bring Back Borrowing
When I was in 6th grade, my first year at an all-girl’s, school, my class went on a ski-trip. I’d never been skiing before, so I had no ski-pants, no wool socks, no long underwear. I remember my mother called her friend Dorothy, to see if her daughter, Emily, had some ski-pants I could borrow. She did, and I borrowed them. My mother did, however, buy me some wool socks.
Borrowing was pretty normal back then, my mother and her friends were depression-era babies, so they were frugal. If they could borrow instead of buy, why not? Of course, teen-age girls always love to wear each other’s clothes, and I did a lot of that. In fact, well into my 30’s I was borrowing my friend Hie-Jung’s clothes anytime I got invited to a special event. I wish she lived closer to me now, because shopping her closet is one of my favorite things to do.
The way I see it, there is no shame in borrowing. Particularly when we are talking about rarely used items, ski-pants for a kid (that they’ll grow out of before next season), a dress for a black-tie event, a rash guard for a trip to Florida. Why do we all need to have something for every eventuality? Sure, Rent the Runway can solve the what-to-wear-to-your-cousin’s-wedding issue, but does everything have to be shipped? Wouldn’t it be more fun to go over to your friend’s house and play dress-up? I’ll lend you my black & gold embroidered coat if I can borrow your silver-velvet duster.
And it isn’t just about clothes. When my oldest son was born a friend of mine lent me a gorgeous antique bassinette she’d used for her son, but she was very clear, it was a loan, not a gift. In fact, just as he was getting too big for it, she contacted me to tell me who would be picking it up next, her goal was to keep it circulating until she had grandkids! I’ve lent out folding tables and sangria pitchers and I’ve borrowed baby slings, jig-saw puzzles and a million books. Stuff is made to be used, so don’t let it gather dust, lend it out, let it be useful. Plus, borrowing is neighborly, when I was growing up (in New York City) people literally used to come by and borrow a cup of sugar. God bless, Nancy, who lived in our building and whose daughter I babysat for growing up; when I was baking a cake for my oldest son’s first birthday, not only did she come through with the parchment paper I realized I needed at 9pm, she brought it up to me so I didn’t have to leave my sleeping son.
As I write this it is 72-degrees. In November. I care about the environment. I feel like we need to slow down our compulsive consuming, if not for our homes then for our planet. So, save some money, meet your neighbors, ask for help, share, save the planet, and remember: grown-ups can play dress-up too!