Out of Chaos an organizing newsletter

Letting Go of Old Ideas

My clients have a lot of very specific ideas about how things should be done. I do, too. But sometimes, no matter how reasonable those ideas once were, they are no longer helpful. They may even be holding you back.

Ever since I was pregnant with my older son, who is now 20, I’ve tried to make it a rule to go to the grocery store once, and only once, each week. Sometimes we cheated, of course, and the farmer’s market didn’t count. Lately, though, I’ve had to give up that rule. Our beloved Fairway closed, and we haven’t found another one-stop grocery we like as much; plus, our kids are older and our lives are a little more fluid these days, and that’s all okay. It’s taken me a few months, but I’m opening up to the idea that menu planning in my house is morphing into a different thing, and maybe even a good thing: less rigid, with more room for collaboration and on-the-fly creativity.

We all have ideas that rule us lodged in our brains. Sometimes I feel like my job is to pick holes in people’s firmly held ideas.

Maybe your grandmother told your mother that the old desk you don’t like was valuable in 1955. Have you searched online? Sent pictures to an auction house? Maybe it’s not as valuable as you think—or maybe it’s worth selling.

Probably, your mother told you never to run the good china through the dishwasher.  But probably your mother’s 1970 Maytag was too rough for wedding china. Your Miele likely has a setting for fine china—check the manual. You probably don’t really need a third set of dishes for “better than every day.”

Having clear systems and rules are reassuring. Believe me, no one loves a set way of doing things more than I do. But times change, things change, and sometimes dearly held ideas no longer make sense. So, as we approach a new year, why not resolve to be open to change and make room for new ideas in 2021. Because I for one, am ready for something new.