Out of Chaos an organizing newsletter
If Only
For those of you who’ve read my book, or been reading my newsletters for a long time, you might know that the “F” in my FLOW technique* stands for Forgive yourself.
I always joke that people are disappointed because they want organizers to be strict disciplinarians, and I come out of the gate letting you off the hook. But what I want is for you to forgive yourself so you can move on. There are recurring themes that come up for my clients as we begin our organizing work: over-shopping, avoiding paperwork, duplication due to disorganization. And the thing I hear over and over is, “Ugg… if I’d only had you here 5-years ago!” “If I’d only dealt with this 20 years ago!” “Why did I wait so long?”
I know. It’s a bummer to look back and realize how small actions in the past could have made the present easier and more serene, but forget it. That regret and self-recrimination aren’t doing you any good today. And at heart, I’m a big ole hippie and I want you to be here now, man. However, that doesn’t mean that I’m letting you off the hook. In fact, what you’ve realized is a valuable insight: that your procrastination or shopping habits have led to this clutter that you now have to dig yourself out of. So, let’s start digging, and while I don’t want you to waste a second on “If only” “I should have” or “I could have” iI think it is fine if you learn the lessons and don’t repeat the mistakes.
Lesson 1: Avoidance doesn’t pay, it only makes things worse.
Lesson 2: If you bought to much in the past, STOP. Let your home recalibrate, see how long you can go without buying anything.
Lesson 3: If you frequently end up with duplicates—be they duplicate jars of spices or duplicate passports—slow down, take stock of your ingredients, be methodical about where you keep items so you can find them rather than repurchase them. Time spent creating order is always time well spent.
So, forgive yourself, but don’t forget your past mistakes: learn from them. Today is the day to start working towards a less cluttered, more organized tomorrow.
*FLOW: Forgive yourself, Let stuff go, Organize what’s left, Weed constantly.